Something For The Weekend

Ever wanted to eat from a toilet?

Erin uncovers THE WORLD'S WEIRDEST DINING EXPERIENCES...

For the thrill seekers:

Dine 800 feet above Las Vegas at the Top of the World Restaurant in the Stratosphere Tower, Las Vegas.  This restaurant offers a great view of the city as it revolves 360° in one hour and twenty minutes.  Too tame for your liking?  The double-deck elevator takes 30 seconds from the ground floor to the observatory deck; that is 1,800 feet per minute or 3 floors per second.  After dinner, enjoy any one of the three thrill rides from Insanity which hangs its riders 64 feet from the tower and spins them up to 3 G’s to Big Shot which catapults to a height of 1,081 feet at 4 G’s.

For those of few words:

There’s no such thing as a language barrier in this Barcelona restaurant because the only language spoken here is the language of pantomime. Mim, a theatre-cum-restaurant, offers a unique dining experience with mime waiters and various mime sequences acted out in-between courses.  (Not for those with a severe hatred for mimes of those afraid of being caught in an imaginary box.) Mim, Paris 193/197, Barcelona 

For the potty mouths:

Head to the Toilet Bowl in Taiwan for a toilet-themed dining experience.  Diners sit on Western-style toilets while eating out of Asian-style ‘squat-pots.’  Portions come in two sizes: number 1 or number 2.  Restaurant complete with colourful tile interior and urinal light fixtures.  I’ll pass on the chocolate ice cream, thanks.
Toilet Bowl Taiwan, Taipei Metro Hsinpu Station Exit 1, Taiwan

For the deep sea divers:

Take a three-minute (simulated) submarine voyage to reach Al Mahara, an underwater seafood restaurant underneath the Burj Al Arab Hotel in Dubai.  Restaurant also includes a magnificent circular aquarium.  However, these amenities are no gimmick; Al Mahara is ranked as one of the top ten best hotel restaurants in the world.   

For the spud lovin’:

Potato pancakes, potato - meatballs, florentine potatoes, potato casserole, rösti potatoes, baked potatoes, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, potato latkas…  You best like potatoes because that’s what you’re getting at Der Kartoffelkeller, a restaurant in Berlin with over eighty menu items dedicated to the potato. 

Don't keep your tastebuds in the dark...

It’s normally nerves that make you lose track of your mouth when forking your food to your face on a blind date.  It’s not usually the fact that you’re actually blind.

Dans le noir is a dining establishment that blows all the rules of etiquette out of its non-existent windows.  Couples and groups of strangers alike have been gathering nightly in this new Farringdon hot spot since its opening a few months ago, for a multi-sensory experience that actually works by eliminating your most precious one. Sight.

With similar operations in Paris and Zurich, the concept of dining in the dark was designed initially to create awareness of disability.  All the waiters at Dans le noir are either blind or partially sighted.  Sitting in the lounge with post-work cocktails we looked nervously around at the strangers who were just as intrigued as us as to what lay beyond that ominous curtain.  We’d heard the rumours of course, but would it actually be pitch black in there? Would we actually have to ask to go to the toilet? Would we really find new confidence in our ability to talk to a stranger, simply because we couldn’t see the judgement (or the pasta sauce) on his face?

Our waiter, Roberto, greeted us with a welcoming smile and lead us confidently in a train with our hands on each other’s shoulders, down the red-lit corridor and into the restaurant. It was instantly terrifying, if only for the fact that we could hear the scrapes of cutlery on china, the chatter of our dining companions, the animated conversation that accompanied the smells of their food, but we couldn’t really tell if we were about to walk into their tables. 

Shut your eyes in any restaurant and an image of your surroundings is still imprinted on your eyelids. The light from the windows on your left, the colour of the dress on the lady sitting opposite, the flickering of the candles or the pattern on the wallpaper behind you.  All of this creates a reason to dine out that doesn’t always involve the food. Dans le noir changes everything.  There are no distractions.  And where there is nothing else to divert your attention, you’re left only to think about your food.  How funny this is when you can’t even see what you’re eating. 

We opted for the surprise menu and tasted mashed potato that turned out to be hummus.  We clumsily carved into pork that turned out to be veal, and let slices of warm baked apples slide across our tongues without realising they were actually peaches.  With a glass of wine to accompany every course we had so much fun trying to figure out what was on our plates, without actually caring about anything other than the fact that it all tasted so good!  I’ll admit to scraping what I thought was mash up with my fingers and tearing my meat with my hands to save stabbing the plate with my knife.  One thing we all noticed, as we chatted away, was how quickly we ate, desperate for the next surprise to tantalise our taste buds.

By the time two guys approached our table, (one almost sat in my lap as he missed his chair), we were quite content in our new environment and had almost forgotten that outside it was 98 degrees and still sunny.  We’d even discussed things we wouldn’t normally have mentioned, losing inhibitions as the darkness hid our facial expressions and focusing simply on words.  That said, this place would be perfect for a first date, but even on a night with your friends, you’re bound to uncover a few surprises.

A world of total darkness is one that thankfully, most of us will never have to adjust to permanently.  But experience Dans le noir just once and chances are you’ll walk away appreciating what a different world you would live in, not only if appearance didn’t matter, but if your ignorant taste buds were always this alive.

By Becky Wicks

Book our exclusive dans le noir social event. October 24th. Two drinks and tapas in the dark - £15 HERE

What exactly is Fuerzabruta?

What’s it like?

Remember that dream you used to have, where you were running as fast as you could but you never seemed to get anywhere? Fuerzabruta starts off like this, with a man jogging full force on a treadmill as the world rushes past him.  Then he flings himself through a wall of boxes and you’re thinking, hmmm, nope, that was never part of my dream. That’s just weird.

And the truth is, the whole 60 minute show is a bit like that dream that never quite made sense, but left you awake in your bed, staring up at the ceiling, thinking only how amazing it was anyway.

What’s it about?

You could spend hours and hours trying to read a deeper meaning into the series of metaphors that make up the story of Fuerzabruta.  But the truth is, it’s probably better if you don’t.  It probably doesn’t even have a deeper meaning.  Just like that dreamlike train of unconscious thoughts it unfolds before you, bypasses all logic and captures your imagination.

   
Who’s in it?

It’s put together by the same Argentinian performance group who brought us the incredible De Le Guarda and the Roundhouse’s previous hit Villa Villa, but as the for the cast, a bunch of total randoms.  Well you wouldn’t get the likes of Patrick Swayzee or Ewan McGreggor hanging themselves on cables and swinging upside down in an indoor rain shower, would you?  Oh, there are some HOT looking guys for the ladies though, check out the guy eating his dinner in the runaway restaurant, (don’t ask). Don’t worry, there’s plenty of knicker flashing and wet-t-shirt style antics going on for the lads too.

What should I look for?

Well, the whole show is sensory overload so wherever you look, you’re going to see something weird or wonderful.  Here’s a tip for you though, when you go in, try to get as near to the middle as possible.  Pretty much everything goes on above you or on podiums so if you’re short, you’ll be ok, but when the ceiling lowers and the water nymphs are gliding above your heads, you’ll have to be in the middle to reach up and touch them through the Perspex. Sounds freaky just writing it, but trust us, it’s cool.

Verdict

It’s definitely not a play, not a musical, not a poem or a piece of drama.  Fuerzabruta is more of an experience.  With loud music and rhythmic chaos, strobe lighting, hot nude bodies, a lot of water and strange inhuman languages, it’s one you won’t forget in a hurry. Have a beer in the Roundhouse roof garden before you go in and get ready to enter a dream-world you never thought you could visit with your eyes open.

Watch Fuerzabruta at the Roundhouse from £25

things for the diary this weekend...

Things to do on Friday July 21

NIKE MIDNIGHT MADNESS (Crystal Palace National Sports Centre Ledrington Rd) - The search for Britain’s best basketball talent

LONDON BORN: A MEMOIR OF A FORGOTTEN CITY (Burgh House, New End Square, London) starts at 2.15pm. Helen Day uses recordings to illustrate her grandfather’s experience between the two wars.

Things to do on Saturday July 22

EALING BLUES AND ROOTS FESTIVAL (Walpole Park W5) 2-10:30pm
-The Guv'nors + Connie Lush & Blues Shouter + The Incredible Blues Puppies + John Otway + Hollow Bone + Sunset Boulevard + The Odyssey Blues Band + Roland Chadwick + more come together for London's largest blues festival

VENETIAN GONDOLA RIDES (Little Venice, between Blomfield Rd, Warwick Ave, and Warwick Crescent, London, W9 2PB) Sat & Sun 10:15 am –5:45 pm
- part of Visit London’s Rivers and Waterways campaign, a way to encourage people to get to know some of London’s lesser-known canals and waterways. 

WHAM BAM! THANK YOU GLAM! (The Pleasure Unit, 359 Bethnal Green Road) 9pm-2am
- A celebration of everything glam and rock.  Think Bowie, Slade, Suzie Q, T-Rex, and Iggy

BIG DANCE (Trafalgar Square) Sat. All Day, Sun 12noon-6pm
- A weekend of dance related activities.  Watch a variety of choreography styles and take part in the dance workshops. 

REVITALIZE (Regents Park, Chalbert Gate Bride off Prince Albert Road) 9:30am
- a health and fitness weekend for those who wish to get back in shape.  Includes eight-a-side cricket, touch rugby, tennis, yoga, tai chi, and pilates.  Also stalls with health and nutrition advice. 

SHRIMP ROCKETS (28 Rupert St. W1 V 7FR) 6:30pm. - Improvised comedy and a 30min. impromptu play.

THE GREAT SWIM (Epping Forest, Essex, Epping, IGX) - A two-day swim around lido and outdoor pools of Greater London area

Things to do on Sunday July 23

OPEN SESSION (Sunday (Up) Market, 91 Brick Lane)
- play the Middle Eastern Game Carrom, a game similar to snooker, while sipping on masala chai.   

I wanna be a water baby...

In the midst of the biggest heatwave in Britain, Erin McMillin looks into staying cool in London...

This weekend is going to be HOTT and as the resident American intern, I’ve been missing my summers by the pool, terribly.  So I’ve made it my mission to ease my need for home and to find the best places to lounge under the sun (i.e. lidos, ponds, fountains, rivers, anywhere to cool off).

Here’s a few I found—the bad news, I can count the number of pools in London using number of fingers on my hands (if you haven’t noticed, London is a little cramped for space), the good news, THERE ARE POOLS:

Brockwell Lido
Brockwell Park, Dulwich Road, London SE24 0PA
Tel: 0207 274 3088

Built in 1937, this Grade II pool attracts a large number of Londoners who want to cool off from the summer heat.  Area includes sun terraces, BBQs, and plenty of space to lay your towel out under the shade.  Prices run about £4.00 or £5.00 for adults and £3.00 for children. 

Charlton Lido
Shooters Hill Road, London SE18 4LX
Tel: 0208 8567180

Located in the lovely Southeast of England right in the middle of a landscaped park. A hot spot for the summer.  However, this pool is only open on the weekends and unheated.  Alas, we can’t get everything, but this week’s weather willing have you jumping in faster than you can say Kelly Clarkson. 

Highgate Ponds, Hampstead Heath
East Heath Road, London NW3
Tel: 0207 485 4491

These ponds hold tradition that go back until the late 19th century as Londoners found it perfectly acceptable to take a dip in these waters in the wee hours before work.  Hampstead Heath contains three ponds—men’s, ladies’, and mixed—and is open daily from 07.00-19.00.  Relax in this rural setting and get away from the fast-paced life of the city.  However, unlike the generations before, this dip is not free.  The price to swim: £2.00 and £1.00 concessions.

Hampton Heated Open-air Pool
High Street, Hampton, Middlesex TW12 2ST
Tel: 020 8255 1116

One of the only pools I’ve found with a springboard and slides because c’mon, how much fun can you have just wading?  Also an area for laps with fast and slow lanes.  Opening this Tuesday (18th of July) so get there soon.  Costs £4.00 or £5.00 for an adult swimmer

Oasis Swimming Pool, Central London
Oasis Sports Centre,
32 Endell Street, London WC2H 9AG
Tel: 0207 831 1804

Another pool with a long-standing tradition, this site first began as a Turkish bathe used by Queen Anne. Oasis includes two indoor pools and one open-air pool, which was used as a static water tank during the Second World War—another interesting historical fact.  The open-air pool proves to be the most popular swimming locale as use continues even throughout the freezing winter weather.   

Parliament Hill Lido (aka. Hampstead Heath Lido)
Parliament Hill Fields, Gordon House Road, Hampstead, NW5
Tel: 0207 485 3873

Located in North London, this lido reopened last year after impressive refurbishments including art-deco design and stainless steel lining to naturally heat the pools.  A 70 x 30 m space, this expanse allows plenty of room to socialize or get in a few laps.  Also includes a paddling pond to keep an eye on the little ones.  Great view of the London skyline and within walking distance from Highgate Ponds. 

The Serpentine Lido, Central London
Hyde Park, London W2 2UH
Tel: 0207 706 3422

Part of Serpentine Lake in Hyde Park, this ‘lido’ has become a very popular watering hole.  Great place to sunbathe with deck chairs and a tiled veranda.  Paddling pool, sandpit, swings, and performances from 2:30-4pm for the kids.  If you’re hungry, there’s a restaurant next door, but remember to wait at least one hour before jumping back in or else you’ll be attacked by a school of frenzied piranhas…or get cramps, whatever (at least that’s what my grandmother told me).

Tooting Bec Lido
Tooting Bec Road, London SW16 1RU
Tel: 0208 871 7198

The first thing that attracted me to this lido was that Brad Pitt was once spotted here while filming the movie Snatch.  But besides that point, Tooting Bec is one of the earliest and largest open-air pools in London.  Also includes a suite of jacuzzis and saunas.   Open from 6am-7:30pm daily. 

Somserset House Fountains
Somerset House, Strand WC 2R
Tel: 020 7847 4600

A great way to bring out your inner-child.  Watch the intricate water display and dash in and out of the jets trying to not get wet.  Pretend the water is molten lava or better yet acid, sulphuric acid, acid that seeps from the depths...

what's so super about that?

So, in the new movie, Lois Lane’s won a Pulitzer prize for her essay about why the world doesn’t need Superman.  Clever chick.  It got me thinking… surely in this day and age the concept of a super man is different for everyone?  Particularly if you’re a woman.  Who exactly is Superman anyway? And if there was only one of him, soaring his red-panted way across the London skies, would he actually be doing us more harm than good?

Think about it. Every woman would want him.  And every woman would compare her own man to the ultimate embodiment of masculinity – the one she could never even have.  No normal man would be good enough, not really, not even those men we previously ogled at in awe.  Brad, Orlando, Beckham, sure, they’re alright, but they’re not… well…. they’re not super, are they?

No matter how strong your boyfriend might be, he’ll never quite be able to lift your house and relocate it to the South of France in ten seconds, just for a change of scenery.  No matter how sexy he is, he’ll never really quite get the knack of undressing you with his eyes, literally.  And no matter how brainy your well-chosen piece of horn might be, he’ll still never fool the world with a pair of glasses from Specsavers.  The truth is, if Superman existed, the woman-needs-man rule would go to pot.  Because we wouldn’t just need man.  We’d need Superman.  And there wouldn’t be enough of him for everyone.

I like to think I’d be the Lois Lane of them all of course.  I and I alone would steal his heart, the only woman in all of this bustling metropolis to make him melt like a Magnum on a sun drenched paving slab.  I’d be his kryptonite, his weakness, and at the end of a long, hard crime-fighting day he’d hover at my window, his red cape fluttering in the breeze, before swooping in and showing me something else that was really super under the covers.

We’d get invited to parties all the time - my specially designed ball gown would compliment the red of his cape, my heels would match the blue of his tights.  I’d tie a little yellow flower in my hair to match the ‘S’ on his spandex suit.  We’d be the perfect couple, ‘Supey’ and I.  On the outside.  But actually… while other women were dropping their ‘normal’ men in resentment, green with envy over my fabulous prize, I’m not so sure I’d be smiling on the inside.

My man would have to rush off every five seconds to stop a car crash, redirect a tsunami or seal the states of America back together before a giant earthquake claimed millions of lives.  I’d be OK about it of course, I mean… I’d have to understand.  It’s his job.  But after five hours at another party, wearing a spandex dress in ‘super’ colours and drinking super cocktails on my own, I’d be watching other couples laughing, joking, being normal, wishing I could be like them.

I’d also age before him.  I wouldn’t let him surgically correct me, even though he’d offer, using the complex laser beams in his crystal blue eyes.  That would be akin to being ashamed of my age, even though he’d live forever at my wrinkled side.  I’d bleed, he wouldn’t.  I’d cry, he couldn’t.  In the evening, I’d stuff my face with chocolate as he saved an entire cocoa farm in Columbia, and in the morning, as I struggled to cook him an omelette without burning the flat down, he’d fly to a little farm in Dorset and gather a batch of eggs, fresh from a chicken’s ass. So annoying.

I don’t think we’d last, me and Supey.  I, like most of the girls I’ve befriended here in London and throughout my life, am an independent woman. I’d end up feeling smothered by my own inadequacies, the things I would never be able to do as well as him. 

So all in all, if Superman did come to London and set about becoming a saviour, perhaps it would be best if we didn’t all kick up a fuss. Before we throw it all out of proportion, maybe us ladies should consider the fact that perhaps the most perfect man for all of us is never going to be the one who’s super. 

Perhaps he’s the one who makes us feel super about ourselves.

The interviews are not just for porn

Our very own lastminute.com lady Becky gets down and dirty with the stars of 'Avenue Q' - the hilarious show at the Noel Coward Theatre in London's West End. The musical follows the journey of a bright-eyed college graduate called Princeton. In search of a 'purpose' he moves to Avenue Q, armed with a tiny bank balance and a lot of lust. Along the way, he meets a variety of weird and wonderful friends and neighbours... perhaps the most crude and endearing of all is the internet loving 'Trekkie Monster'.

As she chats to 'Trekkie', Becky finds out why his signature song is: "The Internet is for Porn". There's no denying he's a charmer; but does she fall for his furry face and intense red eyes? Who knows, we may soon be blessed with tiny 'Brekkies'.

Get in the Q - buy tickets here.

Want to find out more? Visit the Avenue Q site

Erin McMillin asks: is Superman really cursed?

Superman Returns premieres this Friday and Brandon Routh is the lucky cast for the lead of Superman.  Should I say lucky…or rather eternally doomed? After several well-know actors turned down the job (Josh Hartnett, Paul Walker), superstitions have once again surfaced over the so-called ‘Curse of Superman.’
If you haven’t been informed about the myth, the Superman Curse is a ‘series of misfortunes’ involving those in the creative process of Superman and/or those playing the leading role of Superman.  The list reads like the Black Death:

Lane Smith (boss on Louis & Clark series): diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s Disease, died June 13, 2005.

Christopher Reeve: paralysed neck down after being thrown from a horse in an equestrian event, died October 10, 2004.

Margot Kidder (Louis Lane): nervous breakdown

Richard Pryor: multiple sclerosis

George Reeves: suicide (shotgun wound)

Kirk Allen: failed career, retired to Arizona

Bud Collyer (cartoon voice of Superman): circulatory ailment; death age 61

Max and Dave Fleisher: forced to sell Paramount pictures shortly after producing Superman animation series.

Writer of Superman Jerry Siegal and artist Shuster:  lost rights of Superman to DC Comics; no further work.

…and the list goes on.

While I’m thrilled for Routh, a home-grown American boy from Iowa, and his big career break, I can’t help but worry for him and his obvious fate.  It’s a shame.  He was a cute one.   

For more Superman fatalities click here

On The Third Day...

Even in the West End, it's rare that the opening of a play attracts television camera crews and photographers en masse, but on the opening night of Kate Betts' new play there was a sense of chaotic productivity in the flutter of flashbulbs and reckless swoop of boom-mikes outside the New Ambassador's Theatre. The commotion was created, of course, by that highly fertile media-machine, reality TV; Kate Betts is the winning playwright from Channel Four's recent series "The Play's the Thing". The concept of the programme, for those who didn't catch it, was to search out a brand new play, from an unpublished writer, and follow its development from submission to staging - the end product of which is the much-discussed "On the Third Day".

What's it like?
It's an absorbing journey into the emotional anguish of an estranged family. It's stark, other-worldly, often clever and, judging by the sniffles from the people sitting next to me, very moving.

What's it about?
Very near the beginning of the play there is a sweetly comic rendezvous between the female lead, Claire, and a man she's invited back from a bar and is trying, rather awkwardly, to seduce. The scene is lighthearted and filled will very natural and well-observed dialogue. It's a beginning that belies the emotional depths soon to be dredged - the disturbing subject matters of incestual confusion, bereavement and self-harm are met head on in this production with an unflinching eye.

Who's in it?
Maxine Peake - impressive performance as the vulnerable and neurotic Claire.
Paul Hilton - fantastically natural, believeable and magnetically engaging as Mike/Jesus.
Tom McKay, as Claire's brother, Rob.

Who'd enjoy it?
On the Third Day is not for the feint hearted, there are weighty and potentially distressing issues which are blown wide open. If you enjoy a deeply emotional drama, rich in symbolism with some heroic acting performances this could well be your bag.

Book tickets to the exclusive On The Third Day Q & A night, July 20th - just £10

Sara Sha'ath

And the winner is...

Last week we asked you all to tell us why you think you deserved to win our 'Perfect day out in London' competition - a trip down the Thames on a speedboat and dinner for two in a top restaurant.

We had so many brilliant entries but sadly there could only be one winner. We chose Aysha Tupman. Here's what she said...

"Bitten by the travel bug, I went to New Zealand to try a life of farming, surfing, and relaxing.

Four months in, and my heart ached for my wonderful home city - and mostly for my wonderful boyfriend who I'd left behind.  As each day passed I realised more and more how fantastic London is and how much I missed it. The people, the mix of cultures, the mix of the old and the new architecture, the hidden streets and forgotten gems. The smells of foods, the feel of old stone, the art, the theatre, the grafitti. The variation of menus, of cocktails, of themed bars, of warehouse parties.

Now I am back with my two loves - my city and my boy - and want to make the most of every last minute I have here. I'd love to treat him to a romantic day on the river in style,  to remind us both of why I came back - to be with him in London."

Aaaaaaaw, doesn't that melt your little hearts? (sniff)  Congrats Aysha, you'll have to tell us all about it!